Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize