I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize