Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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