if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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