so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize
