isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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