just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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