Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
