people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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