So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
