we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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