farters have to be the big spoon...
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize