I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
