Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
