Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat