so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
