Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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