Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Who haven't you slept with?

(703): View more from Virginia

No one comes to mind.

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(623): View more from Arizona

Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?

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(732): View more from New Jersey

Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.

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(901): View more from Tennessee

I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?

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These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
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(817): View more from Texas

well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while

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(904): View more from Florida

I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy

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(443): View more from Maryland

Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?

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(613): View more from Ontario

I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?

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