Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
