I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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