When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
