VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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