Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize