I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
