I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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