It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
im holly from the hills drunk
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize