I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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