they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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