i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
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