You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
