Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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