Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
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