My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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