that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
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