Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Randomize
