1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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