I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
