Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
