I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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