Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
