what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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