How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
