I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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