Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
