Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(816): View more from Missouri

dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?

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(320): View more from Minnesota

If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?

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(778): View more from British Columbia

working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.

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(518): View more from New York

Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.

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(205): View more from Alabama

I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.

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(480): View more from Arizona

I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE

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(561): View more from Florida

Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug

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