Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
