i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize
