Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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