yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
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