I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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